Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Reflections

A restless night - not able to sleep, and I produced a profound piece of work.....

At the beginning of this month, I celebrated a milestone with my fellow graduates from ..Stow High School, Class of '88. 20 years have past since I left the building I chose to call the "clone factory." And it was 20 years later that I realized I had nothing to fear about going back to celebrate and participate in my reunion...

Different paths we all took - but all these paths seemed to have crossed, a whole 20 years later to bring us all back together again. Some things (it was noticeable) never changed......but others had - and for the better.

Grand connections were made with many a good friend, and sadness as well for those we have lost and those who either couldn't or didn't want to be found.

The most valuable tool I took away - reconnecting with my past. For a lot of reasons I wanted to kill my past, never have it rear its ugly head - but, I am a different man now - more confident, more self-aware, more at ease...

I am the man that I never thought I would ever become. Cliché'? Possibly - but unbelievably true. I no longer regret my past, what happened, what didn't, the path I chose, the path I didn't.....they all led me to where I am supposed to be now....

I now have the courage to complete a project I thought I would never get to - working on my book. I have spoken of it before - I have attempted to work on it before - but I feel now is the time. To move my words from my journals to a bound book for all to read.....(we'll see...........)

20 years have past.........they seem as a brief moment in time - not so long ago, I recall....as fresh in my mind now as ever - but not as painful as I remember. 20 years.

To those I reconnected with - I wish, hope, and pray we remain connected...for those of you that I didn't see (Ken Johnson, Jeff Bradbury, Angie Canter, Dawn (Hurst) Myers, and Kenny Wilson)...I am thinking of you, and hope to reconnect soon...

Life is much too short - I wish I could have learned this lesson 20 years ago! But 20 years brings with it much wisdom and solitude. I carry them both - for they are partners in my journey.

The fond memories of my past have come to greet me - they are colorful, blissful, sorrowful, painful, wonderful, silly, weird (it was the 80's), but most of all intense...

Life is much quieter now....much more important...I do stop to smell the roses, to listen to the birds, to hear a child laugh. I appreciate life - what it offers and how I live it. Life is too short not to embrace.

Peace.Love.Live.

JPB

1 comment:

the maggie said...

Thanks for a glimpse over your shoulder into John, circa 1988.

Love you!